Dad loves you and don't you forget it.

This post is for you kids. When I started this blog, I made it with the intention of expressing myself and my feelings during a very difficult time in my life. As I was writing, it became more of a documentary of my life so that one day you kids would get the honest mental thought process I've had during my drastic life changes.

This past weekend, I flew up to Maine to see you kids again. I've missed you guys terribly and I wanted to cry when I walked through the door and saw you kids jumping up and down in excitement. We all had a great time as I took you out and spoiled you rotten doing fun things.
This weekend though, Uncle Ian was telling me how he got into a verbal fight with Kathleen Leggett. When I asked him to elaborate, he said that he got upset when Kathleen mentioned about whether a brother would "adopt" you kids when your mom married again. (During this time, your mother is trying to pursue a relationship with some brother from Northern Maine)

I was angry. Now I know I have to take what Uncle Ian says with a grain of salt, but this would not be the first time that Kathleen has said something before thinking.
Now I don't know the full truth, but the hairs on the back of my neck stood up as I heard this.

I understand that I don't believe the same things that you were raised with. I understand that your mother may eventually remarry and there will be another man that takes you to the meetings, HOWEVER! I will never allow another man to "adopt" my children like you are orphans. You are NOT. You have a father who loves you like no other and I will see to it that I'm always there when you need me.

If you are still in the truth and you are reading this, you need to know that I never wanted to cause you spiritual harm. I really believe that everyone should do whatever it is that makes them a better person and a contributing member of human society.
If pioneering does that, then I will only be happy for you. If you decide to make decisions that maybe I wouldn't agree with, I will still love you.

However, I will not allow anyone try to teach you that your father abandoned you and that you need a male figure in your poor little orphan lives. That is my God given right and right by law.
Hearing about Kathleen's comment made me a little paranoid since I have no idea what happens in the congregation with me not there.
I know that people look at me badly. At one time it hurt, but now...it's just another person's opinion. While they are entitled to it, I'm not going to live my life worrying about what other people think anymore.
Even though they may not like my decisions, I am still your father and I refuse to have people try and undermine my relationship with you kids.

I'm sure they don't go out of their way to tell you about "your awful father", but I do know the messages that you get from the platform and from hearing the way people talk that could paint me as a horrible person. That is simply not the truth and I refuse to let you children be exposed to that. I want to be a good father and I want a fair share in raising you to be as balanced in thinking as possible.

That is my rant for the evening. Just remember I love you kids so much and I hope that as you grow older you will understand how I feel about you and that NOTHING will ever come between us and our love.